Purposeful Blogging (or not)

Do you know that in both Sunday School and worship today, someone mentioned something along the lines of "you are what you read?" Also, one of the regular bloggers that I read just posted on this same thing. It's got me thinking about what I'm putting "out there," and what the purpose is for my own blog...

I can buy the "you are what you read" thing. It's the reason I quit reading the daily newspapers. I was becoming fearful, and worried about things I can't even control. So I stopped.

But why do I blog? Are others influenced by what I write? After all, I could just scribble notes in a notebook, as generations of others have done before me. Why put thoughts on the internet, anyway?

Well...I began the blog because everyone else was doing it. :) Great reason, right? But not a week into it, Neeny got sick. I was in the hospital waiting room for days with my brother's laptop at my disposal, and writing helped me to sort. It always has, really. Writing is an amazing outlet for the jumble that is my brain. When Neeny was sick, the emotion was so much in the forefront of my mind, that I couldn't help but write it. Now, though, it's a little harder. How much to share? Is that the right choice of words?

Since those early posts, blogging has become a way to chronicle our days. The words I write can evoke images, or create moods, or tell stories. They can give presence and meaning and emphasis to the most fleeting of ordinary moments--and they're all fleeting. I tell my students that we write in order to capture where we are right now--on this day, at this moment. Sometimes our words and images are light, dreamy, and full of wonder. At other times, they're sad or contemplative. Personally, I tend to write more when I'm stressed. At any rate, the thoughts and emotions we capture are ours, and they're real--even when we go back and read it later and realize how melodramatic and goofy we sounded! :)

One thing I tell my students, though, and I guess the same is true for blogging, is that you write what you know. I am not an authority on much. For me to write about homeschooling wouldn't make sense, because I've never done it. I couldn't write an editorial on reformed theology, or sky-diving, or bluegrass music, either. I count on some of you to share that knowledge! And oh, how I love when you share your knowledge! I'm not the expert on those topics, but love reading from those of you who are.

I could share with you about special education law, or sitting in meetings with an advocate, or why I think primary Latin should be taught in elementary schools. But that would be boring.

And so, I write what I really, really know. At the core, these are the things you'll find. It's not meant to persuade you to make the same choices I've made, or to get you to change anything, or reevaluate anything, though sometimes reading your writings causes me to do just that. (You are what you read, right? Or does the Holy Spirit do part of that?) I write just to capture a little bit of where I am right now, and to encourage in ways that others have encouraged me. Most of all, I just want to give glory to the One who will outlive all of my youthful attempts to change the world, or figure out life's problems, or just plain analyze myself (and you, too!) silly.

So, I guess what you can expect to find here, should you continue reading, can be summed up in just a few things that I know about:

I know what it is to be a Mommy--to love someone else so much that sometimes I think my heart will break right open--and to second-guess every choice I've ever made with regard to the children the Lord has entrusted to Eric and me.
I know what it is to grow up on a farm with a houseful of brothers and a sister--and one bathroom.
I know what it is to lose a parent as a child.
I know what it is to move every single year.
I know how to love people in spite of their flaws, generally, because I haven't met a perfect person yet, and I'm the most flawed of them all.
I know how to laugh at myself.
I know how to complicate an otherwise pretty simple situation.
I know how to tell stories to make a point, and will try to do a better job of sharing some of them--I do so love telling them to my students!
I know about teaching in a public school system in a rural/suburban area, and trying (often unsuccessfully) to balance that role with the more important roles of wife and mother.
I know how to be resilient, though sometimes it takes a little while.
I know how to reflect.
I know how it feels to be pursued by the Holy Spirit until I couldn't resist any more, and all of my stupid excuses became just that, and then to know gratitude beyond what I could have ever imagined for what I've been given, though I didn't deserve an ounce of that kind of Grace.
I know how a tattoo needle feels. Also, a broken heart, a broken thigh bone, and a c-section. (But you probably won't read about any of those on here!) hehe!

And beyond those things, I'm learning! A total work in progress. I don't ever want to write anything that might cause you to doubt the Lord's direction for your own life--that's why we study the Scripture, seek counsel, and spend time in prayer. My framework for writing couldn't possibly be the same as yours, and I would even try to talk you out of making some of the same decisions I have made.

Thanks for reading, though. I sure do appreciate your taking time out of your life to share, too. I know how blessed I am to have friends--real friends--and family who love me. Some of you encourage me though I've never even met you. For each of you, I'm grateful.
And now it's bedtime. Please blog responsibly. :)