You know you're a teacher when...

You know you teach 5th grade boys when....

...you ask them to cut out balls to make snowmen, and they stick them together and joke, "Look! Butt cheeks! heh heh heh"

...any time someone scuffs a shoe across the floor or scoots his chair, someone raises a leg ever so slightly and murmurs (as though I can't hear him), "Excuse me."

...they ask to go to the bathroom, and come back with notes from their girlfriends in their hands.

...they still bring toys to school.

...they don't acknowledge you in the hall when they're with their friends, but they leave you letters in your desk drawers and occasionally write tributes to you that they read aloud in class--sweet enough to bring tears to your eyes.

...sometimes they call you mean, and sometimes they call you "Mom"

You know you teach special ed. when....

...December 1 becomes your favorite holiday. (All of our funding for the next comes based on our enrollment in special programs on Dec. 1. So every kid we need to place, every kid we even consider enrolling, has to have a meeting & paperwork completed before Dec. 1. November is a nightmare. December 2nd is a cake walk.)

...you know exactly what FMD, MMD, SLD, SLI, LD, EBD, IEP, SBARC, GAP, RTI, and "autism noises" are.

...you dream about your students once a week, at least, and still remember their birthdays 5 years after they've left you.

You know you're a teacher when....

...you walk into Target and walk out $50 lighter with stuff that never makes it into your house.

...the meteorologist mentions "snow," and you begin to pray--fervently!!

...you wouldn't trade your job for anything in the world--except a massage and a day off.