Gratitude

In 2007, I lost 2 grandparents (one of whom was my matron of honor in my wedding and lived with us) and 3 aunts and uncles. Eric lost his grandmother and uncle a week apart. To say things are different this Christmas would be an understatement. These are the people who gave us our traditions, and invested in us our whole lives. We are grieving not only the loss of our loved ones, but the loss of our way of life--esp. this time of year.

Still, through the grief process, we are overcome with gratitude. Goodness, none of us could ever deserve any of the gifts the Lord has given us. Over the next couple of weeks, I want to spend some time and space reflecting on some of these gifts. Neeny said once after Grandaddy died that she wanted a long visitation for him, because "When the bottom falls out of your world, you need to see what you've got left." When I look around this Christmas, here are some of the incredible gifts that I see. I'm going to list one at a time, just so I can be specific in ways that I'm thankful...beginning with Eric.

Eric
When I met Eric at UofL in a British literature class, I noticed immediately the calm he exudes. He didn't say much, but when he did it was brilliant. The teacher loved him. We were in a study group together, and one night our study group went out to eat after studying. Eric and I talked then, and when I got home afterward, I told Andrea that I had felt so safe and protected that night, just talking with him aside from the group. Isn't that a dumb observation after one night? He asked me out that week (I had just turned 21), and we went to see The Nutcracker. He brought me flowers. I thought that was a kind of dorky move. I liked it.

We dated a long time. I worried that when he saw all the warts I had, he'd leave. He didn't. He took my brothers and me fishing, built snowmen with us, and watched our favorite movies. We went looking at Christmas lights together. He became part of my family. Every day, he loved me. And I felt so safe and protected.

We got married, and learned to budget our money. We didn't have much. On payday, we would go out to eat and to a movie or something--what a big thrill paydays were! We cooked dinner together every night, fought over the laundry, and watched Friends on DVD. When I got pregnant, I was sick all the time. He brought me crackers, pulled over fast when I told him to, and held my hair out of my face while I threw up. He called when I was late getting home from grad. school, and I called him just to chat while he drove home from work. I felt so safe and protected.

We have added to our family, moved twice, moved my Grandmother in with us, gone on vacations, lived paycheck to paycheck, changed jobs, wrecked cars, lost loved ones, and built a life together over the past 7 years. He works very hard at a job he hates, helps with the kids, and reminds me to get my oil changed. Sometimes he tells me I'm as much fun as a root canal. He doesn't say much, but when he does, it's brilliant. :) Most of all, he listens to me, supports me, loves me every day even though he knows each of my warts (and my stretchmarks) by name at this point, and tells me he likes my curly afro hair first thing in the morning. I feel so safe and protected.

I am very proud of my husband, and extremely thankful for the gift of him in my life. He's the first one I want to talk to when I've had a good day, and the one I want to fix it when I've had a bad day. Eric is the first thing I'm thankful for this Christmas.