Last Words

A few days ago, Katrina posted on an irregular heartbeat she was having, and quite irreverently requisitioned readers for some ideas for last words.

Well, it cracked me up. I'm still praying for her heart, of course! But the idea of planning your last words just makes me giggle! Oh, the possibilities!!

I did a little research, and came up with some dying words of some famous people. They're interesting. They're so different! Some humorous, some resigned, some wistful, some brave, some cowardly....but all ultimately meeting the same fate at the end. Death. That old, great equalizer. My favorite quotes are from John Barrymore, Napoleon Bonaparte, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, James K. Polk, Oscar Wilde, and Woodrow Wilson. Of course, there's always Fred Sanford ("I'm coming, Elizabeth! This is the big one!") and Ralphie from A Christmas Story ("It was....it....was....SOAP...POISONING!!") But what would I say? What will I say? Wow, how depressing! But I must admit to enjoying a good giggle during writer's workshop the other day while I penned a few...

A couple of qualifiers: First, I try to say everything I need to say now, while I can. It's a little trick you learn when you lose people you love suddenly. Tomorrow isn't promised. Say what you need to say, and keep short records of wrongs.
Secondly, my ideas varied based on the cause of death. If I had been sick for a long time, I would say something more like "Let's get this show on the road," but if I was in a car wreck tomorrow, I may be a little more upset at my fate and would say something like, "But who will fix Kaela's hair? And teach them to pray? And cuddle with Ben when he gets out of the bathtub and he's cold??" That's why the tone's different in some of them....

So here are some things I hope come to mind when that time comes:
1) I am ready.
2) I'm OK, Doll. (The last thing Neeny ever said to me.)
3) Tell him how very much I love him.
4) Shouldn't have eaten the sushi....
5) Do you see the angels?
6) Hold my hand.
7) I have no fear, and I have no regret. (I do, of course. But isn't it more comforting this way?)
8) It was all worth it.
9) It wasn't long enough!
10) When you marry again, I will haunt you if she doesn't love my children right!
11) Sing to me.
12) Leave me alone. But talk to me first. (very likely that I would say something like that)
13) The best is yet to come.
14) Do NOT let them put ugly flowers on the casket, bury me in a rocket ship (a wood box is fine), or sing I'll Fly Away at my funeral. I will not go anywhere until you promise! Colors. Music by my brothers. And long visitation where you can hang out and enjoy loved ones for a bit. You won't always have them, you know.
15) It is well. With my soul.

OK, sorry for the macabre post. It still makes me chucke, though. Thanks, Katrina! :)